Bras: They're Not Just for Boobies Anymore

This evening, Jolene and I shared the most unexpectedly tender (and productive) grooming session. I was walking past the fence, admiring our tiny herd, when she came running over to me — which is wildly out of character. Usually, I have to call her name and bribe her with treats until she maybe decides to grace me with her attention. But not today. Today, she was feelin’ it.

I scratched her shaggy head, and when she leaned into it with a heavy, low grunt of approval, my heart swelled to almost bursting. I gave her some more scratches and pets then grabbed the grooming brush before she changed her mind. Let the fluff harvesting begin!

With every stroke, gobs of her soft, fluffy undercoat came loose — pure gold for spinning. Yak fiber is warm, soft, and perfect for knitting all kinds of wearables. And the best part is when people ask where you got it you get to say, “Oh this? My yak.” But there was so much fiber coming off her, the brush was getting clogged with nearly every pass. So I started pulling the tufts off as fast as I could and jamming them into my jeans pockets.

Which, let’s be honest, filled up almost immediately. Because women's jeans pockets? Pathetic. They're so small they're practically useless. They might as well just be decorative. Cargo pants might be in my future.

But the fluff kept coming. And I couldn’t just let it blow away — this stuff is precious. I scanned the area for a bucket or a bag or anything within reach that could serve as emergency fiber storage. Nothing.

Desperate times called for creative measures. So... I started stuffing the fiber into my bra — first the left side, then the right. My meager B cups quickly became nice, full C cups. I felt... buxom. Voluptuous, even. I hadn’t stuffed my bra since middle school, so honestly, it also felt kind of nostalgic. Sure, it was yak fiber instead of tissues this time, but the principle was the same: you work with what you've got.

Anyway, let this be your reminder, ladies: If you're ever in a pinch, put your brassier to work doing double duty. Bras are pockets too!

What’s in your bra? Let us know the most unusual thing you've put in your bra down in the comments!

P.S. I once put a couple sticks of butter in my bra to quickly soften it for use in a cheesecake recipe. Worked like a charm!